The ups and downs of my relationship with Brittany Murphy

I've been a little leery of Brittany Murphy ever since I had this dream that she was really upset because she lost her job doing the voice of Luanne on King Of The Hill (she used to do the voice of Joseph too and lost that gig after the character hit puberty). I consoled her and she tearfully invited me on a date, whereupon she led me into an ambush and the entire roster of the Queen's Golden Gaels football team beat the living crap out of me. I know the real Ms. Murphy had nothing to do with this, but I couldn't help mistrusting her just a little bit.

However, I've begun to warm to her. It's clear that she's a talented comic actress with a great deal of charisma, after all. And she's not bad to look at, either. But what really won me over was the killer quip she got off on Letterman regarding her ex-boyfriend Ashton Kutcher's May-December relationship with Demi Moore:

"I suppose the crux of their relationship is that to him age doesn't matter and to her size doesn't matter."

PUNK'D!