Cameron Diaz: Uncensored and unsexy

Normally, I wouldn't post a link to anything pornographic. Fortunately, linking to the infamous Cameron Diaz bondage video doesn't represent any sort of deviation from that rule after all, as it turns out there's nothing erotic about it at all. It's so mind-numbingly dull, I'd almost go so far as to call it work-safe. If you absolutely have to clean the pipes to footage of Cameron Diaz, you'd be far better off going with that gratuitous, mesmerizing scene from Charlie's Angels where she jumps out of bed and ecstatically shakes her Spiderman Underoos for all they're worth.

Speaking of unappealing:

• Krispy Kreme has turned their doughnuts into a frozen beverage for summer. Just when you thought America couldn't get any fatter, here's your opportunity to suck a glazed doughnut through a straw.
• Roy Orbison wrapped in clingfilm is unappetizing in principle, certainly, but these fantasy stories on the subject are oddly compelling.