On a magic carpet ride
A couple of weeks ago, I was talking to my old girlfriend Michelle. Here’s how it went:
Michelle: I’m so tired. I got up at 3:00 a.m. this morning.
Me: Why so early?
Michelle: No reason. Then I had a steak for breakfast.
Me: Really? Did you have steak and eggs? Did you go out for breakfast?
Michelle: No I just fried up a steak. Then I flew to work on my magic carpet!
Me: Oh. I see.
I bring this up because I’ve mentioned a few occasions recently in which I’ve taken advantage of the gullible, so I thought I should point out that I’m susceptible to being duped too. Then again, it’s not like I was swallowing a ridiculous whopper in this case. But then again, I should really know better than to ever believe Michelle when she’s talking about what she had for breakfast.
Years ago, she decided that she wasn’t a very good liar, so she’d better practice. She figured she’d start by fibbing about the most trivial, harmless, banal things possible. So she’d casually mention that she’d had cereal for breakfast. Then, later in the day, she’d crack up. I’d ask what she was giggling about, and she’d say she’d really had an English muffin.
Weird little chick, but I suppose that’s probably what I liked.
4 Comments:
That's such a sweet little anecdote. You miss her.
I wish I'd had a steak for breakfast.
Actually, I had a bacon and egg roll, so that's almost as good.
PS. Update more, it's hard to waste time at work when you don't.
cjs: Speaking of sweet little anecdotes about the dear girl, there's always this.
Kendal: Most days, my breakfast is a bowl of oatmeal flavoured with cinnamon and a packet of artificial sweetener and some milk filched from the cafeteria. But when I feel like a nice dirty breakfast, I get a BLT with egg, cheese, and mayo (aka the "Peter Lynn"). When I want something even greasier, it's a grilled cheese and sausage sandwich (aka the "Duane Keisz II"). (I think everyone at work should have a sandwich named after him or her, just like celebrities in a New York deli.) Delicious.
My resolution last year was to post more. My resolution this year was actually to post a little less.
I usually have either cereal (I find the ones with the brightly coloured boxes usually have the most sugar in them) or a muffin and a hot chocolate. And my co-workers call me a sugar junkie. Lies!
Gee, it's not like anyone actually keeps their resolutions anyway.
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