Ruddy Ruddy #4

The fourth piece of Ruddy Ruddy mail is in. Based on the outline of a small box inside the envelope, and the markings outside, it clearly contains a sample of Pepcid Complete. Should I open it?

No. Besides the previously-established point that I'm making of not opening any Ruddy Ruddy mail -- instead preserving it for display on the Wall of Ruddy Ruddy -- the whole point of a free sample is to get potential consumers to try the product, with no strings attached. Therefore, it is more fraudulent -- and therefore more fun -- to waste the company's resources by not opening it.