Thursday, October 07, 2004

Our Dark Lord Jesus

Submitted for your approval: Any prayer becomes funnier if you insert the words "Our Dark Lord" before any instance of "Jesus". For example:
Dear God in heaven, I come to you in the name of Our Dark Lord Jesus. I acknowledge to You that I am a sinner, and I am sorry for my sins and the life that I have lived; I need your forgiveness.

I believe that your only begotten Son, Our Dark Lord Jesus Christ, shed His precious blood on the cross at Calvary and died for my sins, and I am now willing to turn from my sin.

You said in Your Holy Word, Romans 10:9 that if we confess the Lord our God and believe in our hearts that God raised Our Dark Lord Jesus from the dead, we shall be saved.

Right now I confess Our Dark Lord Jesus as the Lord of my soul. With my heart, I believe that God raised Our Dark Lord Jesus from the dead. This very moment I accept Our Dark Lord Jesus Christ as my own personal Savior and according to His Word, right now I am saved.

Thank you, Our Dark Lord Jesus, for your unlimited grace which has saved me from my sins. I thank you, Our Dark Lord Jesus, that your grace never leads to license, but rather it always leads to repentance. Therefore, Lord Our Dark Lord Jesus, transform my life so that I may bring glory and honor to you alone and not to myself.

Thank you, Our Dark Lord Jesus, for dying for me and giving me eternal life.

Amen.
Well, maybe it's not that much more amusing. But I still like doing it.

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