Monday, February 06, 2006

Team Semenex shoots off all over MvC

You'll never guess who replied to the post about Semenex: Team Semenex! Let's see what those cum-guzzlers have to say for themselves:
While it is understandable that clowns probably don't get much action, oral or otherwise,1,2 for the rest of us vaginal and oral sex are both enjoyed... and often together. (I'll pause as you recover from the shock such a revelation surely must have caused you.)3 Thus, as we had received questions from our customers re: whether Semenex might affect sperm potency, we were happy to reply.4

Now, as reading skills are apparently also in demand among those with a predeliction for white face paint,5 if you can find "pineapple Kool-Aid" or any other "fruit drink" capable of sweetening your load... buy it! However, as repeatedly stated and explained at our product website,6 Semenex main ingredients are 9 times more concentrated than in Nature.7 Thus, while obviously more expensive than "Kool-Aid",8 yet $1.83 per daily serving is a lot less expensive than going to the store and buying ingredients equivalent to nine 8-oz. glasses of pineapple, banana, celery, broccoli, and strawberry juices.9 And that doesn't include Semenex' additional ingredients.10
  1. Okay, Peter here. I've got to ask: Do I come off on this site as a man or a clown? Because the name of the blog is "Man vs. Clown". I'd kind of think that if anything, it sounds like an anti-clown site. I guess it depends if I usually seem more antagonistic or defensive. If it's the former, I'm the man who is against clowns. If it's the latter, I'm the clown, and you're all out to get me.
  2. You'd be surprised how much action clowns get. Sex TV even did an episode on it. And according to this site, a clown fetish is called "coulrophilia".
  3. I am shocked. How is this possible? You'd have to have a vagina in your mouth. I suppose Linda Lovelace did set a precedent for this in Deep Throat in the role of a woman with a clitoris in her throat. And actually, a lot of men with goatees look like they have vaginas for mouths. Guys, please, if you haven't already, shave your goatees. It's not 1994 anymore.
  4. I still don't get it, though. If you're trying to knock up your wife, you should be putting all that sperm in her vagina, not her mouth. But kudos to Semenex for answering these customers' concerns, even if it's disheartening that this was evidently a question asked frequently enough to merit inclusion in a FAQ. Kudos to them also for keeping such close tabs on the blogosphere, actually. I'm so impressed I'm giving them another free ad.
  5. Ooh, burn! Except misspelling "predilection" kind of undermines the jab at my reading skills.
  6. If they've told me once, they've told me a thousand times. Why can't I get it through my thick skull?
  7. What's with the capitalization of "Nature"? Who's writing this, Francis Bacon? Did they develop Semenex by placing Nature on the rack in order to force Her to yield Her secrets?
  8. Are these sarcastic quotation marks denoting that they aren't actually talking about actual Kool-Aid?
  9. To be perfectly honest, Semenex does sound at least as good as V8.
  10. I.e., a rich source of protein to be added by the user immediately prior to serving.

3 Comments:

Blogger Chance said...

Thank you for sharing. I literally wiped tears of laughter from my eyes. That was hilarious.

2/07/2006 12:16:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait... Does it make you impotent or not?

2/08/2006 11:24:00 AM  
Anonymous Exclusive Escort Companions said...

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