Wednesday, January 25, 2006

The NKOTB Syndrome

Submitted for discussion: Lenny Kravitz is to men what Jennifer Love Hewitt is to women: celebrities who provoke near-universal looks of disgust among those of the same sex by the mere mention of their names, for reasons that are hard to articulate but boil down to jealousy of their adulation by the opposite sex (who are invariably surprised by the vitriol aimed toward them) combined with an accurate critical judgment of their mediocrity.


Blogger Dickolas Wang said...

In support of your argument, I do hate Lenny Kravitz, and I'm also very surprised that women hate Jennifer Love Hewitt.

However, I had no idea that women love Lenny Kravitz, as I always sort of assumed that everyone thought he was kind of lame. Well, not everyone, but at least that the gender balance of his fans was about 1:1.

1/25/2006 03:27:00 PM  
Blogger Peter Lynn said...

Women generally seem to think Kravitz is hot, and this seems to blind them to the fact that he's really a poseur. He may look the part of a rock star, but his tunes have always been highly derivative, albeit catchy at times. At least he's no longer quite as pretentious and useless as when he was Romeo Blue, the Kevin Federline to Lisa Bonet's Britney Spears.

I think Jude Law is another example of the NKOTB Syndrome, by the way. There's really nothing special about him at all. He's good-looking, but not even in a memorable way. And in all other ways, he's very forgettable.

Oddly enough, I actually found two girls in the office who aren't appalled by the very existence of Jennifer Love Hewitt. It turns out there is in fact a little love for Love from the ladies.

1/25/2006 03:48:00 PM  
Blogger Heather said...

I like Lenny circa "Mama Said" (nothing since). Sexy tattoos!

Can't explain it, but I just can't stand Jennifer Love Hewitt.

I think she's a fucking bimbo if that helps - she has quite a vacuous expression.

1/25/2006 04:56:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've never been too attracted to Lenny Kravitz. He perpectually looks like he needs a shower.
As for Jennifer, I know why I hate her; she thinks she's Audrey Hepburn. She may have similar facial features, but she has no where near the same amount of class or grace.


1/25/2006 05:31:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just for stats' sake, I concur with the hateage of Jennifer Love Hewitt (Kravitz, meh, take him or leave him), for two reasons (1) she has "Love" in her name, and (2) she mentions her breasts far too often.

I wouldn't mind this if they were something to write home about ("Dear Mom, re: Jennifer Love Hewitt's fun bags: PHWOAR") but they seem ordinary to me.

(Word verfication: Cpt Lg. Where's a package when I need one?)

- Gloria

1/25/2006 06:26:00 PM  
Blogger Peter Lynn said...

I went to school with a girl named Lindsey who changed her surname to Love. She had a legitimate reason (something to do with either taking on or abandoning a step-parent's name, I think), but being named Lindsey Love made her sound like Superman's favorite porn starlet. Fortunately, while she's quite beautiful, she's anything but vacuous so she can get away with having a lightweight moniker.

I believe "Cpt Lg." stands for "Captain Large", my old locker-room nickname. But while J-Lo-Hew certainly didn't help her case by having the audacity to star in that Hepburn biopic, you can hardly blame her for talking about her best attributes, as it's all anyone else ever seems to want to discuss. I agree that they don't seem extraordinary except at certain moments when she turns just so. She's no Milena Velba, that's for sure. But I read something this morning about her considering doing Playboy or some such thing, so we may have a better idea of what we're talking about soon.

1/25/2006 07:53:00 PM  
Blogger Gage said...

I actually don't hate Jennifer Love Hewitt nor do I love Lenny Kravitz. But in general, women tend to love hating things I think. For example, I hate the Burger King. He's just fucked.

1/25/2006 10:16:00 PM  
Blogger Mr. Pants said...

I find both Lenny & Jenny both completely unappealing.

And not in a good way.

Hatred stems from insecurity and jealousy (both one and the same, thinks I) and so, the culture of celebrity and the animosity it creates, only points to the underlying fact that both men & women are insecure. Does this make insecurity bad?

1/26/2006 01:44:00 PM  
Anonymous Eric said...

How can anyone hate the King?

Guys hate Lenny because he's a no talent-hack, who still pulls tonnes of poon. I used to hate Brad Pitt the same way, but he pulled together some movies (Seven, Fight Club, Kalifornia) where he showed he does have talent - and bingo-bongo, the hatred went away. If Lenny ever stops pretending he's Jimi Hendrix with a sampler, guys everywher emight learn to love him.

And guys love JLH, well, just because she's Jennifer Love Huge-Tits. :) She's wholesome enough to bring home to mom, but you just know she's a dirtly little girl at heart.

1/26/2006 02:24:00 PM  
Blogger Dickolas Wang said...

I should say though that the riff from "Are You Gonna Go My Way" entitles Lenny Kravitz to whatever success he has, in my eyes. It's like his one real sterling contribution to music.

1/26/2006 02:42:00 PM  
Blogger John Eje Thelin said...

I have this distinct feeling that i read somewhere that Kravitz writes chord prgressions and melodies, but not the riffs themselves. I could be imganing things, though...

A Milena Velba reference! How very Deutschporn of you.

2/03/2006 12:42:00 AM  
Blogger Peter Lynn said...

Milena Velba is the Eighth Wonder of the World. But I thought Deutschporn involved pooping on people. The old Rhineland Steamer, if you will.

2/03/2006 02:20:00 PM  

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