Man vs. Clown!: Don't "Douglas C." Me

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Don't "Douglas C." Me

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"All right, mister, what do you think you're doing? You call this a room? This is a pigsty! I want you to straighten up this area now! You are a disgusting slob! Stand up straight, tuck in that shirt, adjust that belt buckle, tie those shoes! Twisted Sister? What is that? Wipe that smile off your face! Do you understand? What is that? A Twisted Sister pin? On your uniform? What kind of a man are you? You're worthless and weak! You do nothing! You are nothing! You sit in here all day and play that sick, repulsive, electric twanger! I carried an M16 and you ... you carry that ... that ... that guitar! Who are you? Where do you come from? Are you listening to me? What do you wanna do with your life?"

I had this whole thing committed to memory when I was a 12-year-old boy. I can't wait to have kids of my own.

4 Comments:

Christina said...: I'm sure your children will appreciate the 80's hair band reference. Kids of the future love that stuff.; 3/22/2006 03:02:00 PM
Chance said...: That guy was Twisted Sister. Without him, the band would have been nothing.; 3/23/2006 12:31:00 AM
Anonymous said...: If fashion is cyclical, then is music too? Shouldn't we be all be listening to doo-wop right now?; 3/23/2006 02:05:00 PM
Peter Lynn said...: I love doo-wop. Although now that I think of it, there's something wrong with that name considering how many doo-wop groups were Italian-American.; 3/24/2006 10:03:00 AM

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