Peter Lynn: World's Greatest Deadpan

The inability of bodybuilders to read notwithstanding, my company is releasing a book. Every time I think the project is finished off, it pops up again. This morning, the intern who I fooled with my "World's Greatest Dad" trophy stopped by while I was giving it my third proofread. Seeing I was busy, she left. Later, after I'd finished, she came back.

"What happened to the book you were working on?" she asked.

I shook my head. "I scrapped it. It was too much work. I cancelled the project."

"Really?"

"Screw it. It’s not worth it. We’re not doing it."

"You can do that?"

"No."

"I hate you."